Sorry if this statement offends anybody, but I personally don't understand why it is anyone elses concern my "working" status. But in fairness to those just curious and to shed some light as to the "why" I work part time not full time, I will endevour to answer to the best of my ability.
Way back when we started thinking of having children, we discussed when and how often I would return to work. I work as a nurse, so I have some flexibility. At this stage we were saving to buy a house but also looking at starting a family. We did the sums and worked out that we could manage with me returning to work one day per week. This would give us a little extra income, as well as keep my registration up to date.
Once Aaliyah was born, we had to reconsider our options. Buying a house was put on the back burner, providing the best possible care for her became our priority. We made some drastic changes, Jose returned to study (engineering) to ensure a better income for our little family in the long run. All of a sudden the material things we had aspired to, really were not that important any more.
I had taken 9 months maternity leave. During this time we met with various health care professionals, from Ear specialists, to pediatricians, to auditory-verbal therapists. They all had the same opinion. IF at all possible I should remain Aaliyah's primary carer and day care should be avoided if at all possible. Why?? Several reasons.
Aaliyah has many different appointments that she needs to attend, difficult to do so if she is in day care and I am at work. Secondly, in order to optimize speech and language development, she needs alot of one-on-one time, with someone that knows to make sure she is facing you. To be able to monitor her development. She also wears a hearing aid, but not a normal hearing aid. Aaliyah's hearing aid is held on my a headband. It is not an ordinary hearing aid. Most hearing aids are worn on or in the ear and are air conducted, hers is bone conducted, meaning it has to be in contact with her skull in order for it to be effective. Aaliyah is a typical toddler and doesnt always tolerate wearing it, it requires A LOT of persistence and patience to ensure she wears it as much as possible. She cant wear it with a hat, in the car, and often needs to be repositioned. Something that would be difficult for a childcare worker to provide. Please dont get me wrong, I am not knocking day care or daycare workers, they provide a wonderful service. However they are not always the best option for a child with additional needs.
We also need to monitor her good ear. We want her limit, if not all together avoid any infections etc. If she was to get an infection her, she would be pretty much completely deaf until the infection healed. Lots of infections over time have been proven to cause hearing deficits. We want to avoid this if at all possible. No, we do not "cotton wool" Aaliyah, but we are cautious with her, and know from other parents with children in day care that colds/viruses are part and parcel of the experience.
All of that being said, bills do not pay themselves, Aaliyah's expenses are not about to go away. So I have gone back to work 2 days per week. More than originally planned, but enough that it is do-able. We budget, we make do. Aaliyah's needs ALWAYS come first. With the shift work there is some flexibility, I have a WONDERFUL understanding boss. If I am working during the week, my mum (or Joses mum if she isnt working) watches Aaliyah, and on the weekends or after hours, Jose is able to watch her. Its hard working around all of our schedules, Joses, mine and Aaliyah's but we manage. We do not take for granted the fact that we are blessed to have family help watch Aaliyah. It is so comforting to know that if she is not with me, she is with people that understand her needs, her routine and are able to attend to her as best as possible. This is a huge relief and something we do not take for granted.
You might be reading this and think that Aaliyah has been very sheltered and not well socialised. This is far from the truth. Those of you that know Aaliyah, know just how social she is. She attends a weekly playgroup as well as swimming lessons. She also sometimes attends the hear and say playgroup, a playgroup set up for deaf or hearing impaired children. We also make sure that she is provided with a range of learning experiences. She has play dates, goes on outings (parks, museum, shops) as well as engages in creative play at home (painting, colouring, play dough, cooking, pretend play). We read to her ALL THE TIME. On average she is read 20 books per day. We believe that all of these experiences are all contributing to her speech and language development as well as developing a healthy self esteem. We also go to the library every fortnight (the girl loves her books). She LOVES spending time with both sets of grandparents as well as all of her aunties and uncles. She interacts appropriately with other children. She is an observer, she watches what is going on before deciding if and when to join in.
So that is my very loooonnngggg explanation as to why I dont work full time and may even be a little controvertial. I know that some of you may not necessarily agree, but it is our little family and we are doing what we feel is best for US. I know every mum out there does their very best for their family and that is exactly what we are doing.
On another not... not long to go until we reach 400 likes on Aaliyah's page, almost time for an online auction!!!!!!!
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